Imagine you live in constant tension. Imagine that there is nowhere safe where you live and you can never peacefully go to sleep. Imagine that tonight, as you are falling asleep, you hear some one knock on your door asking for entry. Imagine that the person you live with, your wife, your flatmate, your mother… gets up and opens the door for them. Imagine the person who enters is another person who lives with you; your son, your flatmate’s girlfriend, your father… and imagine that now, knowing that every one who lives in your house have finally come at the end of today, only now you can know that all your family have lived just one more day.

Now imagine for a moment that the people who are knocking on the door are not people who live with you, but they are soldiers coming for you, or your wife, or your parents, or your children. Imagine you can never sleep in peace thinking they can come at any moment. Imagine that every time some one rings the door bell your whole family come out to the living room terrified, looking into each other’s eyes, deciding who will open…

J. and A. left yesterday, with all the other Israeli and international activists who came just for the demonstration. A handful of us have stayed to “cover” for the possible incursions and raids.

Today two of the other people who are staying with us came quite a bit later than usual and they found the front door locked. They had to go all the way round the building, until they found one light on: mine. They knocked on the window and asked me to open the door for them. The door made quite a bit of noise, even though I tried to open it silently.

I was already going to bed when the upstairs neighbour came down with an expression of panic on his face.

“Who knocked on the door?”


“No one else?”

“No, no one else. We’re just arriving now, we’re sorry to bother you at this time.”

“No bother. I thought they were soldiers.”